I’m bordering on the heretical here. Bachelor parties have always involved copious quantities of beer, women, and gambling, right? Suggesting anything else is blasphemy. Why stop what works?
I know, I know. However, I’m not telling you how to live your life. I’m merely offering another opinion. Conversely, a counterweight to the inexorable weight of strippers and tequila. I know I’ll catch some flak for this, but here we go.
According to CNBC, the average millennial spends just over $1,000 attending a bachelor party. By CNBC’s math, attending 9 parties will add up to about a third of a down payment on a house. Where’s that cost coming from? Flights and a nice hotel are obviously a big part of this. But excessive quantities of expensive liquor and gambling will help rack up the bills. We haven’t even talked about tipping strippers yet. If you’re the frugal type, maybe a bar crawl in town is the better alternative to a weekend bender in Las Vegas.
2. The conversation about the bachelor party can be revealing
If you told the lucky lady that there wouldn’t be any strippers at the party, but your bachelor party was something out of the days of Sodom and Gomorrah, you have some relationship problems to work through. The lack of honesty and trust here is problematic. Inversely, if your fiancee doesn’t trust you to be within seven nautical miles of a strip club, let alone have your party there, you two need to work on some things ASAP.
3. You don’t want to jeopardize the relationship
Drinking and beautiful women can be an alluring combo. Do you want to be the guy who does something he’ll regret at his bachelor party? Don’t let a tequila-fueled night at a strip club ruin your matrimony because you had a moment of indiscretion. Cheating is obviously the worst thing that could happen, but there are other errors you could make while out. Calling your ex to intermittently cuss her out/tell her you love her is certainly better than cheating on your fiance, don’t get me wrong. Still, it’s less-than-ideal, to put it euphemistically.
4. Hangovers suck
That alone could be reason enough to think about having a quieter party. A day of sitting quietly with the lights off, eating greasy food, and attempting to not upchuck sake bombs is not a great way to celebrate your rapidly waning bachelorhood. Of course, there’s a happy medium between not touching alcohol and puking into a Taco Bell to-go box at 4:00 AM. Alas, it might be a good idea to find that medium.
There’s nothing wrong with a weekend of debauchery. But your party doesn’t have to be a modern-day bacchanal if that’s not what you want. Don’t feel pressured to have a high-spending carousal in Vegas or Atlantic City if that’s not what you’re into. The guys in your crew might expect you to want to go to every strip club in the tri-state area, but it is again your party. If you really just want to play board games and drink craft beer, then it is your god-given right to do that. In summary, don’t let tradition for the sake of tradition dictate YOUR PARTY.